We went into Dr. Reinhard's office the very next morning for our first insulin shot. Talk about being out of my comfort zone. One minute your an ordinary mommy and the next minute your a full time nurse required to give your child of all things SHOTS!!! After what felt like a microscopic lesson on how to give a shot, we were sent home with needles and a bottle of Lantus (long acting insulin) to give Carter every day. I was very surprised how little knowledge had been given to us on what a person with diabetes could and couldn't eat. We had three days to make it until outpatient therapy and I just laugh at what misconceptions I had for Carter. We pulled everything with any sugar from his diet including fruit and basically just fed him meat and cheese for a couple of days. The first time I had to give Carter a shot on my own, he ran screaming and crying from me and hid under the bed. I literally had to drag him out and hold him down. He was crying, I was crying (not to mentioned terrified and unsure about doing his shots myself) and the whole experience lead me utterly dreading the next time I had to give him a shot. My poor son really had a hard time grasping what was going on with him and it is really just heartwrenching as a parent to watch your child suffer and struggle with issues that you can't fix. Here is my email from the very next day.
"Hi friends....I just want to praise God and thank you for your prayers for Carter last night and today. After Friday morning's traumatic injection I truly didn't think we could both do it again. However thanks to your prayers we saw God's hand at work. Carter asked us first thing this morning when he was going to get his shot and then after I used the new "inject a pen" he said it didn't even hurt. Praise God! Literally an act of the Holy Spirit and day and night difference from Friday morning. Thank you guys! Please continue to pray for Carter for his little mind to slowly digest all of this information. Tonight at bedtime we were talking about how many more days until we go see Dr. Jelley. I told him that we were going to have to start monitoring his glucose levels probably in his finger....his reaction of course was "Does it hurt? Carter buddy...I really don't know but I promise you I will monitor mine as well so you are not alone." There is so much to comprehend. At times today honestly I was very discouraged. I went to the library and checked out a couple of "kids" books on juvenile diabetes and honestly I couldn't handle the negativity. I for sure am not reading them to Carter. I want us to tackle this thing through Christ's strength. My dear friend Christy Cook sent me a CD which has a song on it that truly sums up this...I will copy the words at the end of this email.
At bedtime tonight we read from Carter's bible on David and Goliath and how David had no fear because he knew God was bigger than Goliath. We talked about David being a true superhero because he trusted in God and overcame Goliath even when it seemed impossible. Carter and I talked about our "Goliath" being diabetes and that in God we are to have no fear. We worked on memorizing Nahum 1:7 which states "The Lord is good, When trouble comes, he is a strong refuge." Specific prayer requests for next week include :
1. God's covering and protection over Carter's body as we still seek healing and prayerfully a perfectly normal reading on Monday morning at Dr. Jelley. Emma, Hope, Jim, and I have been laying our hands on Carter and praying for healing. Pray for our experience with Dr. Jelley and divine wisdom for him as a physician. (On a side note, he does have a 9 year old son who has diabetes so we know that he has personal experience with all of this).
2. For the worry to subside for me as I am anxious about every morsel that goes into Carter's mouth right now not knowing if it has too much sugar or carbs for his little body to handle. I really am looking forward to a road map if indeed we are facing Juvenile Diabetes.
3. For Carter as he is really terrified of pain...they accidently forgot to run the growth hormone blood test last week so we might be facing another blood draw early this week. Let's just say that it was truly a nightmare for us both to get 3 vials of blood out of my 36 pound son while he was just screaming. Secondly if we are facing that again pray that he would not have such a severe reaction phsycially with headaches and emtionally with his fear of needles, shots, and pain.
4. Pray for the many people who are watching loved ones suffer through illness and trauma that the peace of Christ that truly transcend understanding will guard them and gird them as they walk through the days ahead. This week in particular seems to be full of people experiencing this.
Thank you dear friends in Christ, I could not walk this road without the body of Christ lifting us up.
by Casting Crowns "Praise You in this Storm" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHdcyue0bSw
"I was sure by now that you would have reached down and wiped our tears away. Stepped in and saved the day. But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining.
As the thunder rolls, I barely hear You whisper through the rain "I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls, I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.
I'll praise You in this storm, and I will lift my hands for You are .....who You are
no matter where I am. Every tear I've cried, You hold in Your hand. You never left my side
and though my heart is torn, I will praise You in this storm.
I remember when I stumbled in the wind, You heard my cry. You raised me up again. My strength is almost gone, how can I carry on if I can't find you.
I lift my eyes unto the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and Earth. I'll praise You in this storm, and I will lift my hands for You are who You are no matter where I am. Every tear I've cried, You hold in Your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn, I will praise You in this storm."